travis' brain dump

ya know… nothing irritates me more than people who are immature… i’m sure many of you know the kind of people i’m talking about, we all know them.  

from 16 to 30 and sometimes way further, people who can’t handle the goings on of life and in turn do completely idiotic things because they choose to make up their own explainations for things and don’t explore the complete truth or the entire picture. this is just one aspect of immaturity i’m actually addressing… but its a big one. from religion to relationships with each other, people often take the “easy way” in their own mind and in turn make completed idiots of themselves by assuming the rest of the truth rather than taking the time to learn it. i’m sorry if this sounds judgemental, but it is… this is one of the very very very few things that push me to this and i can’t stress how much it frustrates me. i wish i could give an example, unfortunately that would point fingers at people so i need to keep this general but I will use a vague approach…

one of the most irritating things is assumption. assuming you know the whole truth because you ‘ read between the lines’ and thereby live your life according to such self proclaimed doctrine. you’re doing nothing but putting up barriers that will keep you from ever being content and happy with your life and in the end, leave you miserable. my message to you? be direct, ask questions, get answers, find the truth and see it for what it is… plain and simple. in the process, you might actually find your relationship with friends and maybe even family will improve once you decide to grow up a little. life is not *that* complex. sure there can be some complex issues, but thats only because people make them complex because they don’t want to take the time to explore the truth in its entirety. most things should be taken at face value… nothing more, nothing less.

grrr… sadly… i believe that even my words won’t help as this has evidently been a problem in the world since the dawn of time… i mean look at the Bible… lol 1 Corinthians 13:11 — Paul even had to point out some issues with it… hehe go Paul!

“When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” 

… end rant …

for the record, for people who can’t seem to understand the point of this post because they don’t take it at face value… this is not a religious rant, don’t assume it is just because i quoted the Bible at the end — i just happened to find humor in that verse because it applies.

later

“I get paid on Friday. …which means I’ll have money until Saturday morning. :)”

i know i have paychecks that feel like this… lol

that is what i am today… yes, dumb me up until 2am again last night playing video games… do not pity me nor cheer me on, just look on in observance and shake your head. another great round of FFXI last night… mike and I both got our characters up to level 20 (a milestone for us) and got our subjob quests completed. now its onto bigger and better things while we explore that huge world… (geek moment there)

on a side note, its not like i could really sleep anyway… still trying to figure out what to do with the kiddo – no word from the school yet, which i’m guessing means she didn’t get in… i just wish people would at least call and say yes or no so that you didn’t sit and wait. very frustrating. i’m glad i shave my head, or i’d be pulling my hair out right now… but i guess we don’t get given anything we can’t handle so somehow i’ll figure this out. people who are single parents and can get this stuff figured out have my greatest respect, this stuff is insane and i swear its going to drive me to an early grave. but i tell you what… one look into your kiddo’s eyes and you know what you’re going through hell for and wouldn’t trade it for anything. i’d do anything for her… anything. (for those too lazy to look at my gallery, here’s a pic of my kiddo)

 

on a lighter note, however — my refi is in underwriting right now… so that looks promising… the appraisal went well and should everything go as planned i should be set to go by the end of the week. now, i just need to make it through today without falling asleep. lol i’ll be fine if i can make it to 3:30 – my second wind will kick in and i’ll be set for the rest of the night. with that said, i need to get some work done… more documentation and such yay… i swear, i didn’t know just how much stuff i did or oversaw until i started this project… what the heck was i thinking!? lol

later

 

just pardon me here… i’m about to sound like a utopian idealist or a hippie or something… but its what is on my mind.  

do you ever have one of those perfect moments… you know, when everything seems so clear?

it’s like you understand your purpose in life and the meaning of what you’re doing if not only by a simple feeling? like the first time you stand on a mountain top and the only sound you hear is the wind or the first time you look into your childs eyes after they are born. if you have not had a moment like this, i highly recommend finding a way to experience one. you don’t have to rush to a mountain top or have a child, those are just examples. they can happen any time, any place and for any reason, but what you must keep in mind is that you must keep an open mind and accept its arrival when it comes. it comes as an emotion, an understanding and you know it for what it is when it happens. i’ve experienced many such moments in my life and I just wish my entire life could be one continuous series of those moments. it’s like being at peace without dying. i feel sorry for people who can’t find these moments amongst the many trials and problems in their lives… it seems to me like it would be a waste of existence. for those brief moments i think we find ourselves in touch with what and who we really are, our true selves. we spend so much time of this world, caught up in fighting with each other or finding things to fight with each other about that we lose sight of our own existence and who we really are… politics, war, religion, economics, whatever… they all seem to cloud who we really are inside. i wish we could actually all get along, but unfortunately the nature of our human existence doesn’t seem to allow for that. but, if you can find a way to connect with who you really are and experience the ‘perfect moment’, i encourage you to do so…