travis' brain dump

that is what i am today… yes, dumb me up until 2am again last night playing video games… do not pity me nor cheer me on, just look on in observance and shake your head. another great round of FFXI last night… mike and I both got our characters up to level 20 (a milestone for us) and got our subjob quests completed. now its onto bigger and better things while we explore that huge world… (geek moment there)

on a side note, its not like i could really sleep anyway… still trying to figure out what to do with the kiddo – no word from the school yet, which i’m guessing means she didn’t get in… i just wish people would at least call and say yes or no so that you didn’t sit and wait. very frustrating. i’m glad i shave my head, or i’d be pulling my hair out right now… but i guess we don’t get given anything we can’t handle so somehow i’ll figure this out. people who are single parents and can get this stuff figured out have my greatest respect, this stuff is insane and i swear its going to drive me to an early grave. but i tell you what… one look into your kiddo’s eyes and you know what you’re going through hell for and wouldn’t trade it for anything. i’d do anything for her… anything. (for those too lazy to look at my gallery, here’s a pic of my kiddo)

 

on a lighter note, however — my refi is in underwriting right now… so that looks promising… the appraisal went well and should everything go as planned i should be set to go by the end of the week. now, i just need to make it through today without falling asleep. lol i’ll be fine if i can make it to 3:30 – my second wind will kick in and i’ll be set for the rest of the night. with that said, i need to get some work done… more documentation and such yay… i swear, i didn’t know just how much stuff i did or oversaw until i started this project… what the heck was i thinking!? lol

later

 

just pardon me here… i’m about to sound like a utopian idealist or a hippie or something… but its what is on my mind.  

do you ever have one of those perfect moments… you know, when everything seems so clear?

it’s like you understand your purpose in life and the meaning of what you’re doing if not only by a simple feeling? like the first time you stand on a mountain top and the only sound you hear is the wind or the first time you look into your childs eyes after they are born. if you have not had a moment like this, i highly recommend finding a way to experience one. you don’t have to rush to a mountain top or have a child, those are just examples. they can happen any time, any place and for any reason, but what you must keep in mind is that you must keep an open mind and accept its arrival when it comes. it comes as an emotion, an understanding and you know it for what it is when it happens. i’ve experienced many such moments in my life and I just wish my entire life could be one continuous series of those moments. it’s like being at peace without dying. i feel sorry for people who can’t find these moments amongst the many trials and problems in their lives… it seems to me like it would be a waste of existence. for those brief moments i think we find ourselves in touch with what and who we really are, our true selves. we spend so much time of this world, caught up in fighting with each other or finding things to fight with each other about that we lose sight of our own existence and who we really are… politics, war, religion, economics, whatever… they all seem to cloud who we really are inside. i wish we could actually all get along, but unfortunately the nature of our human existence doesn’t seem to allow for that. but, if you can find a way to connect with who you really are and experience the ‘perfect moment’, i encourage you to do so…

so, i should be sleeping right now, but i needed to get some laundry done, so here i am. i’ve got some pants and some shirts on their final spin right now, so as soon as that is done and i put em in the dryer, i’m done for the night…

well, this week has been insanely busy… i can’t believe its thursday (being almost 1am) … i’ve been so busy this week i haven’t had a chance to post since monday… so, what have i been up to? oh wow…

to begin, i’m doing a refi on my house, finally got my credit good enough to get a fixed rate 30yr mortgage on my house so i’m stoked… got a decent rate considering what the market is at right now, so i’m not complaining. the only catch? gotta make sure my house appraises for 235K. it should considering all the work myself and my friends have been putting in here… every day this week from 4:45pm to 9:00pm there has been insane work going on here. while i’m on that subject, i need to express how extremely grateful i am for my friends, specifically my “brothers”, you guys are the best. Andy & Mark, you’ve been here every night this week and I cannot express how much your help has meant to me… Kris & Mike came up today to help out some too which was awesome… so far we’ve completed the front yard fine trimming (all we need is a mow now), scraping/sanding of the trim, the deck has been restained already (that was all Andy folks, rock on bro!) and all thats left is to paint the trim and finish the yard and inside house work… that should be pretty easy to accomplish tomorrow barring any unfortunate weather interventions. so far its been good so we should be set. again, i cannot express how much these guys mean to me… i owe Andy huge on this one, lol.

so, i’m sitting here listening to pandora.com — if you haven’t checked it out and you like music, then get your butt over there… so badass! anyway, the clothes have finished, so i need to get some sleep – another busy day tomorrow as its our last day before the appraisel. wish me luck!

later

(btw, if you want to stop the music, the player is at the bottom of the page) 

i think only andy will understand the title and subsections of this blog… if anyone else gets it… then right on you’ve understood more of whats going on around me right now… 🙂

if you get it, post the answers in a comment.

there is no meaning to this blog other than that… its purely for entertainment value as well as a few blurbs from me on what i’m thinking about the phrase i’ve picked…

… static, bumbidit bum bum bum, static …

static electricity, dryers… static… dryers…. yes, i just shocked the living crap out of myself not more than 2 minutes ago… i seriously got air with that one… lol no other connection here, just funny that ambient music demands the ‘ consumer ‘ deal with static.

… i can find shelter, in this world, i’m searching for another world, where i feel safe …

this would have to be the perfect analogy for when i drown myself in music while trying to figure out problems… this being the case right now… there have been a few more analogies all night long, which is what sparked me into writing this… funny how that works…

… if i could reach you, catch you, make you understand! if i’m not dead enough for life, am i alive enough for death …

no hidden meaning there folks… that was just funny to me… andy will laugh, just you wait.

… (female) mr speaker i love you (male) thanks mister speaker for letting us dance the night away …

oh yes… music, i couldnt live without it… especially music this good. few groups can i listen to over and over and man, let me tell ya, i’ve been jammin these guys for days – especially while playing Hexic HD and Bankshot Billiards… two very good games on my 360 which are just perfect for music like this.

… will we fight it? will we play? will we start all over again? well we better do something, I’m losing this game again, the same old game …

… new start, re-start, empty pages, make some changes, install everything new …

had to get two from that one… perfect explaination of life there don’t ya think? although I believe the song speaks more from the aspect of the battle of life and relationships its funny how music in and of itself expresses points of view of subject matters based on the artist (the writer that is) feels … i mean you take Trent Reznor for example… holy cow, that is one pained individual, however I have always felt a relation to the music when i’ve been in those types of moods… hence why i like so many different types of music… life is diverse, its not hip-hop or country 24-7… explore yourself in music… with that i leave this blog for those who wish to play to comment. name the songs listed here… this one is an easy one. future ones may be WAY more difficult. 🙂

… we’ve never been close to them, the distance is our shield …

Now, go hug someone… ROFL.

later